The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown was such a perfectly timed gift by my friend Linda (Thank you, Linda). She handed it to me at my door on her way to work one morning, the day after I got back from my trip back east this winter break. Linda had bought two copies, one for herself and one for her daughter. Her daughter didn't want it, but Linda new it was worth sharing and that's how it came to me. I know it's worth sharing too, and hope you pick yourself up a copy very soon.
To be honest, my first couple hours spent with this book made me feel pretty vulnerable. I put it down and didn't pick it up again for a week. I'm so glad I persevered, because I've had at least one incident that called for the skills I read about in
The Gifts of Imperfection. And by skills, I really just mean I made a decision to step into the difficult moment with compassion for myself and others. This is not an easy task in our culture.
I've watched Brené Brown's Ted talks on
vulnerability and
shame and I really enjoyed them. Each talk is just about twenty minutes and worth your time, I promise. The subject matter may sound less than appealing, but trust me, it's worth a little discomfort. She unpacks the tools you will need for living a wholehearted life. She does so with humor and beautifully defined everyday emotions and experiences that we, as a culture do our best to ignore. Tools you need to live a wholehearted life? Courage, Compassion and Connection. It's a short 126 pages and they are filled with nutritious food for thought.
Brown's
The Gifts of Imperfection reminds me a bit of the book
Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.
The Gifts of Imperfection, and how she got to her understanding of these gifts was through a spiritual awakening, or breakdown - however you want to spin it, it was a mind blowing event that changed her understanding of her research and herself. Csikszentmihalyi's
Flow goes at it by examining a person's state of consciousness. We take a look at his subjects and theories from a slightly more distant perspective. I wouldn't say it's instructional, but by peeking into the lives of people who experience flow in their days, we learn how changing one's perspective on failure, for instance can change your understanding of who you are. And, incidentally, the less attached you are to your ego the more able to connect with flow you shall be. Not that I remember him mentioning ego in his book, it was more about how his subjects had a certain lack of self consciousness about them. And how they were able to look at failure as part of learning rather than labeling themselves as failures (another thing that Brown and Csikszentmihalyi have in common). Flow is one of those books that altered my consciousness and the way I approach my days. I will be ever grateful for that. It is a book worth reading again and again, methinks. If you haven't read these books, you should. Let me know what you think!
Don't have time to read the book, but want to know more? Spend a little time with TED:
Brené Brown's Ted Talks
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's Ted Talk
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