{this moment}

Birthday Bonfire. Just the guys.

::grateful::

I am grateful for

[sometimes] hard lessons to grow by
help from Ry building my "office"
progress on the little blue house
the woods I walk in daily
"new" food for Max
deep breathing
possibilities
Jodi

{this moment}

It's a summer moment...

:: grateful ::

I am grateful for:

a class on liquid enamel techniques - mmm
walking in the redwoods and on the shore
happy birthdays and boys
sunshine and sunglasses
friends, all of them
smiles and laughter
the hope of rain
cauliflower
Kitty-dog
paint

I'm grateful.

It's Been a While

Greetings family and friends. It's been a while. Summer was filled with travel and family and a couple of summer camps. We've had three birthdays, football season and school have begun, and our little cottage with the hole in the roof is being repaired since last I wrote. None of which can account for my slothfulness in writing here. Marilyn has again reminded me of my absence here at Tese's Place. So here I am, making an appearance. Hi.

Max getting ready to climb some trees!

Max turned 11 in August! Eleven. He started middle school and MMA (mixed martial arts) this fall. There is a whole lot more school in school this year. So far he's enjoying the challenges (most of the time). Max loves to laugh and meet new people. He is a truly lovely human with a big heart and a ready smile.

Coleman turned 14 on the 18th of this month. Fourteen. He will be able to drive in a year and a half. Football season began on the first of August, and not a moment too soon. If it were up to him he'd play all year. School is going well for him, he's got his friends and his game. Coleman is growing up, he's funny and is good hearted and has a strong sense of himself.

Coleman on a rope swing.

I turned a year older in August. I like to think that I get better with age. Don't tell me if it isn't true. I try and I try to be better with each passing day. Sometimes the effort pays off, sometimes I take a step back. I keep trying, though. I've been trying really hard to walk a lot. I got a fitbit for my birthday and have been tracking my steps by the day. It sure is motivational when you can see how many steps you've taken at any given moment in the day. Or how many you have not. I like it. It's measurable, a lot of my life is not measurable.

Chris' birthday is still about two months away. He gets better with age too. A good chunk of his summer was spent in Portland, OR working. We like that town, it's a lovely place to visit. He's been riding as often as he can which is never as often as he'd like - it keeps him young and happy. Chris has stopped eating sugars, high glycemic carbs and starches. Friday night pizza you may think is out for him, but no! I've made pizza with cauliflower crust. And it was good.

Our little cottage has been undergoing repairs. Much needed. We moved to Soquel a little over seven years ago and I am sure it needed work back then. It became unavoidable when water started entering the house via the roof. There hasn't been much rain in these parts for a lot of seasons. It doesn't take much rain to ruin a building and its contents though. So now we've got a new roof and windows. It's pretty now. And there's no mold. And it doesn't smell bad. All good things. Just a few finishing touches and we'll be able to use it. Next onto landscaping! That will be an interesting project and one that will make home so much more pleasant.

Well then. That's about what we've been up to these past weeks and months. There was a lot more, but at some point pictures are more interesting than words. So I'll leave you with some shots of our adventures. Hope you are all well.

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

read: Why Can't I Get Better? Solving the Mystery of Lyme and Chronic Illness

Why Can't I Get Better? by Richard I. Horowitz, M.D. is a must read for anyone suffering from a chronic autoimmune illness, or who knows someone who is. I ordered it through Amazon after listening to a Lyme Ninja podcast with Dr. Horowitz as a guest speaker. Full disclosure: I'm not finished with this book yet. I'm half way through and I've got it marked up and dog eared. I've got a long list of other things to research from this reading. Most importantly, though I have a much better understanding of the illness my two boys and I have. It's both encouraging and overwhelming to read this. Encouraging because I have discovered more information from this book in the past couple of weeks than ever before (remember I'm only half way through it, too). I have sought information that is meaningful and helpful for 13 years now, so that gives you an idea of what a gold mine this book is. Overwhelming because the complexity of chronic illness and understanding illness, treatment as it relates to me and mine makes my head spin. There's also this nagging reality that we may not ever fully recover, always being hunted by the clever little organisms within our bodies. They are able to remain dormant for years, waiting for your immune system to be vulnerable. Rest assured though, that if you have been suffering with Lyme, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia or some other autoimmune issue you will find answers in this book. Answers like: the right questions to ask your physician, the right tests to get done and enough information so you can find the right physician for you. Knowledge you will gain from this book might just make the difference between hope and despair. So, order this book, be ready to write in the margins, take notes and get educated!

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

::grateful::

I am grateful for 

morning walks in the forest

a visit from Nana Rose

happy, smiling Max

backyard bonfire

morning coffee

kind people

yoga

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

 

 

::grateful::

I am grateful for:

flowers in the forest

a day at TEDx Santa Cruz

Basmati rice

ice water

pizza

my community

out and about: Capitola Village

I took this photo with my iPhone 6 through the home made telescope!

The other night my friend, Jodi and I went to Mr. Toots in Capitola Village. A coffee house on a Saturday night, we're such party girls! We had planned to go for a walk on the beach but Chris and I had hiked about ten miles earlier that day and I just didn't have it in me to clock another four miles - and it was really cold. Jodi was a pal and agreed to skip the walk and do coffee cake and coffee with me instead. Life is good when you've got good friends to share it with.

On our walk back to Jodi's there was a man with a telescope gazing at the stars. He had made the telescope himself! Um, that's pretty neat, don't you think? This place we call home has some pretty interesting people roaming about it. Just waiting for a conversation.

Jodi looking at Saturn and two of its moons.

create: hearts of gratitude

We painted the clay heart rattles with acrylic paint after they were fired to cone 05.

Recently I volunteered in Max's class to teach a clay lesson with my friend Desiree. The school has no art teacher, but the individual teachers do give some art lessons. It's not as regular as math or humanities. As an artist I find that so sad. Not only because as a society it seems we have devalued the arts, but also because when I was a kid art class or wood shop or sewing or anything that had to do with using my hands was the place I felt most at home in myself. It was also the one place I excelled compared to math or history or a foreign language. I was good at something, and that was using my hands to make things. Every child needs a "win" at school. I'm willing to bet there are children today in classrooms all over our nation that might excel in art - if they were given an opportunity to do so. The more narrow the curriculum the fewer students it serves . . . but I digress.

We had a very short 30 minutes to fit in a project of gratitude and creativity. Miraculously the kids were able to listen and create one or two hollow heart rattles for their mom and teacher in that miniscule window of time. Despite allowing them to dry completely and slowly ramping up my kiln a couple of them did explode - this was my fault for not being explicit in my instructions about air pockets in closed forms. A hole, or several were put in each heart, but clearly that didn't do the trick for all of the hearts.

These heart rattles have little clay balls in them and they make a lovely sound when you shake them. We decided to use acrylic paint to decorate them. It was something we had in abundance and a medium a lot of the kids are comfortable with. I thought it was interesting that the kids were pretty quiet while they painted, especially if you compare it to how loud they were during the building phase of the project. I think they were all happy with their results. I sure was.

Three things I learned while teaching this lesson: 

1. I learned to not rush the first step,  To set an intention. In this case, a one minute meditation on gratitude (or even 30 seconds) would have helped at least half the class with a mindset towards gratitude and a stillness to listen.
2. I learned that it is better to take my time to explain in extreme detail every step, no matter how obvious it may seem to me - even if time is limited. Maybe even plan this part out. (Duh.)
3. I learned that some kids will do their own thing anyhow. And that's okay!

It was a complete joy to work and create together with Desiree and Ilana, Max's teacher. I'm looking forward to teaching art this summer at Max's former school, Tara Redwood. It's going to be a whole lotta fun!

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

::grateful::

I am grateful for

The Forest
Pandora

rain and sunshine and a cool breeze

yoga class

WD-40

my artist community

clay

metal

dirt

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

::grateful::

I am grateful for

this day

fresh eggs

the redwood forest

the beach

lemons!

my family, near and far

my home

listen: work, fitness and nutrition

I recently went on a podcast-listening binge. I love listening to podcasts, especially when I have to do mind-numbing housework, or art projects that need completion even when I would rather run away from them forever.

I discovered one podcast by listening to another. I'm not entirely sure how I discovered Pat Flynn of Smart Passive Income, but I adore him. He embodies optimism and is a perfect example of Carol Dweck's Growth Mindset. However I found Pat Flynn, I'm grateful I did. Whenever I need a little pick me up, a reminder that my career is not over yet, I go listen to his podcast. One after another. He's cheerful, polite, has abundant energy, is creative and has an amazing work ethic and he adores his wife and children. Plus, he's got some interesting and useful stuff to communicate.

I was tooling around town the other week, listening, shopping at the hardware store when Pat mentioned The Shawn Stevenson Model Health Show. Specifically how much useful information he was able to get from the podcast that he could put to use right away. My curiosity was peaked. So when I got home, I went straight over to the iPhone app for podcasts and downloaded a handful of The Model Health Show podcasts for my chores. Here's the one that helped me pull together the boys room: How to Create a Sleep Sanctuary. Shawn, the Model Health guy is also exuberantly happy and positive and a font of information. His podcasts include him pumping up his sponsor's product at the beginning of the show, but once you're past that you get to some good information.

The positive energy is a nice change from the crazy information pouring out of the news industry right now. It's good to be reminded of optimism, generosity, equanimity, humanity and humor. It is a good choice to surround yourself with positive words when you want to embody those things too.

Here are some of my favorite sources of words and out-loud ideas these days:

TED talks, ideas worth spreading
This American Life
Smart Passive Income
The Model Health Show

What are you listening to these days?

{this moment}

an occasional post by me, inspired by soulemama's friday ritual.

read: All the Light We Cannot See: A Novel

I picked up All The Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr at the airport on my way to Canada in December. It was one of two books I purchased for my trip. I finally got to it in the airport on my way home. This book transported me directly to France and Germany and into the hearts and minds of its characters for the three days it took me to read it and beyond. (I would have finished sooner had I not been completely plowed down by some heinous virus that lasted for those three days plus with a fever that would not quit). Such beautiful language, I had to read some sentences over just to experience their beauty again.

The stories of Marie-Laure, a blind Parisian child at the beginning of the book and that of Werner, a German orphan living in a bleak mining town are told in parallel until they are carefully brought together in the later days of the war as both are desperately trying to hold onto themselves and the best part of the world they once knew. Both Marie-Laure and Werner are in precarious places in the world at the start of the story. Werner an orphan trying to fit in and figure things out and Marie-Laure, a young blind girl living alone with her father in a Parisian apartment and thrown into an unfamiliar world. The precariousness of their worlds never seem to right for very long. You witness their inner journeys and the ugliness as well as beauty of humanity. I wholeheartedly enjoyed this book.

Yes, this is another WWII book. No, you've not been here before. It's a read you shouldn't miss.

Spring!

My mother-in-law, Marilyn reminded me it's been a while since I've updated the family on what's going on in our lives. It was Marilyn's birthday April 4th! Happy 80th Birthday, Marilyn! I feel pretty darn lucky to have you in my life. You make the world a better place with your kindness, generosity and thoughtfulness.

This Easter Sunday the boys, Kitty and I went on a two hour hike. Above, you can see a shot of my three guys on our Easter hike. Coleman did the entire two hours shoeless and is none the worse for wear. It was a mellow Easter for this little family. The guys had a friend sleepover the night before and they all stayed in bed until past nine and woke for a pile of pancakes and Easter baskets filled with the usual sugary treats. Chris had a very chilly but decent mountain bike ride in the morning. After the boy's friend left we all hopped into the car and drove west, to the upper campus of UCSC where we hiked in a redwood forest.

This year has been filled with school, hikes, bike rides, friends and a couple of visits to the beach. We're a little more than three months into 2015 and I can say, honestly not much has happened yet. Wait! There was an historic moment a couple weeks ago when every room in my house was clean - at the same time. I don't have that many rooms, I know, but I was so excited about it I had to snap some pictures.

The boy's room needed an overhaul so I patched walls and repainted their once white walls white again. While I was working away at this I was listening to a fitness and health podcast called The Shawn Stevenson Model about creating a sleep sanctuary (though I'm sure I listened to about a dozen over the course of the three days it took me to complete this room, the sleep sanctuary podcast had a great deal of impact). That podcast was just what I needed to really get into what I was doing - I hung room darkening curtains; bought, refinished and placed a new dresser between the beds; purchased new bedding (Ikea, $70 to outfit both beds). I removed untold things from underneath Max's bed. Including, but not limited to already chewed gum and wrappers for candy I can't remember buying. Oh, and I found the black hole where the single socks go to party.

Their room is quite pleasant to be in now. And they were both quite appreciative of all the hard work I did on it. Max was away at science camp all week and returned to a new and improved bedroom. I really wanted to get that room finished before Max got home. Had I not had the Friday deadline they may still have no curtains, as I was looking for a different color. I just love deadlines.

Our Master bedroom was neat as a pin. Nary a stitch of laundry to be seen. The kitchen counter and kitchen table were both clear of clutter for a day, too! And we had a relatively tidy front yard - it had no weeds, but it also had very few plants so it was a bit brown. But also a pleasant relief, somehow.

I'm thinking of painting the hutch white or just stripping it down to the wood. It's got too much of a presence when it's blue.

Check out the new pot rack. I installed that baby myself. It's level. Methinks we need some color in there.

Prayer flags courtesy of Carmenza, my brother in law's very dear and lovable girlfriend.

Just before all this cleaning took place I helped out with ANOTHER auction project. Yes, I know, I'm such a sucker. My new friend, Desiree, a parent in Max's class at Main Street Elementary was in charge and asked if I wanted to help. Well, I didn't mean to, but I took over. Completely.

The Original plan was to make chess pieces with clay. I didn't really want to do this. It seemed boring to me - and a whole lot of work. We were limited with time, we only had the kids for an hour and a half. So I switched it. I did a print project with them of a field of flowers and a school of fish. The kids made the print plates and I made the prints. It took me a whole lot longer than an hour and a half. It took me longer than a weekend. In then end it was all fine. But that creative process can be really painful. I was, as I usually am, so happy to send it on to it's new owners. I only have one picture of one print. Each child made one flower and one fish. The flowers took them an hour and the fish took them fifteen minutes.

This is the piece before it was framed. Not a great shot, but you get the idea. This print, framed got $250 at the auction.

When all the work was complete, Kitty and I did a hike by the beach. We actually hike most days, but her walks were shorter and fewer whilst I was in the midst of the auction project and the cleaning project. She's such a patient little lady! We love her so.

Coleman, 13 yrs., 6 mos.

The boys are huge! Coleman, at 5' 8.5", has two inches to go to catch up to Chris - and the last time he was weighed he was up to 127 pounds. Max is over 4' 9" and over 70 pounds. They're both doing well in school. Though my greatest wish for them is that they could learn to enjoy themselves while doing their schoolwork, it seems an unrealistic wish. Still, while they resist and complain and it clearly pains them, I think it's also important to them. Such contrarians.

Max wrote a great short story today. This is how it began:

"Hi, my name is Max, I'm ten years old and I'm gonna tell you the amazing story of how I discovered a world that is not our own inside a secret cave, inside a swimming hole, inside a redwood forest." I just love this - not sure why he doesn't embrace it more. Except I think he'd rather be catching birds:

Max (10 yrs., 7 mos.) caught a starling today. It was in the chicken run.

That's all for now, I'm signing off. 

Lots of love to you all! 

Happy Spring!

2015 Auction Project: Complete!

Here's a shot while it was sitting in my studio, still in progress.

Here's a shot of it at the auction...

There were many steps between what I shared last post and the completed Prayer Wheel. However, I didn't take pictures, and Chris did a lot of building one weekend that I was in bed sick, so I didn't even see how it began to go together. As you can see, there was a change of plans. Instead of using the kids tiles for a table top for the prayer wheel we put them directly on the prayer wheel and did just one row of Om Mani Padme Hum. It was Chris' idea and I think it's much better than the beginning plan. If you have specific questions about how we built this you can always email me.

The kids designs are beautiful, and this year they got to see it before it went to auction! I usually am working on it right up to the moment I have to drive it to the auction and the kids don't usually spend any quality time with it. Along with the requisite mantras and sky and earth mandalas, tucked inside were the children's own words and drawings. It went to a very special family and brought in a handsome sum for the school. It would never have happened without Chris' help and I'm so grateful for him.

Now that that's done, I've got to get that studio back into working condition! There's always more work to do!