read: Why Can't I Get Better? Solving the Mystery of Lyme and Chronic Illness

Why Can't I Get Better? by Richard I. Horowitz, M.D. is a must read for anyone suffering from a chronic autoimmune illness, or who knows someone who is. I ordered it through Amazon after listening to a Lyme Ninja podcast with Dr. Horowitz as a guest speaker. Full disclosure: I'm not finished with this book yet. I'm half way through and I've got it marked up and dog eared. I've got a long list of other things to research from this reading. Most importantly, though I have a much better understanding of the illness my two boys and I have. It's both encouraging and overwhelming to read this. Encouraging because I have discovered more information from this book in the past couple of weeks than ever before (remember I'm only half way through it, too). I have sought information that is meaningful and helpful for 13 years now, so that gives you an idea of what a gold mine this book is. Overwhelming because the complexity of chronic illness and understanding illness, treatment as it relates to me and mine makes my head spin. There's also this nagging reality that we may not ever fully recover, always being hunted by the clever little organisms within our bodies. They are able to remain dormant for years, waiting for your immune system to be vulnerable. Rest assured though, that if you have been suffering with Lyme, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia or some other autoimmune issue you will find answers in this book. Answers like: the right questions to ask your physician, the right tests to get done and enough information so you can find the right physician for you. Knowledge you will gain from this book might just make the difference between hope and despair. So, order this book, be ready to write in the margins, take notes and get educated!

read: All the Light We Cannot See: A Novel

I picked up All The Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr at the airport on my way to Canada in December. It was one of two books I purchased for my trip. I finally got to it in the airport on my way home. This book transported me directly to France and Germany and into the hearts and minds of its characters for the three days it took me to read it and beyond. (I would have finished sooner had I not been completely plowed down by some heinous virus that lasted for those three days plus with a fever that would not quit). Such beautiful language, I had to read some sentences over just to experience their beauty again.

The stories of Marie-Laure, a blind Parisian child at the beginning of the book and that of Werner, a German orphan living in a bleak mining town are told in parallel until they are carefully brought together in the later days of the war as both are desperately trying to hold onto themselves and the best part of the world they once knew. Both Marie-Laure and Werner are in precarious places in the world at the start of the story. Werner an orphan trying to fit in and figure things out and Marie-Laure, a young blind girl living alone with her father in a Parisian apartment and thrown into an unfamiliar world. The precariousness of their worlds never seem to right for very long. You witness their inner journeys and the ugliness as well as beauty of humanity. I wholeheartedly enjoyed this book.

Yes, this is another WWII book. No, you've not been here before. It's a read you shouldn't miss.

read: The Backyard Homestead

Every year around this time I get a little giddy about the potential of my yard to produce food, exercise and enjoyment for myself and my family. Where I live there is potential year round for this yard to produce all of those things for us, our friends and our neighbors, I realize, but there is just something about spring. Don't you think?

My Aunt Helen and Uncle Tom had a little pink house on a little lot in the city of Dorchester, MA. The stairwell walls to their basement were lined with loads of jars filled with vegetables from their garden. I'm sure they weren't the only people in the city who grew copious amounts of food on very little land, but I always found it a magical idea that they produced so much with so little land. This year I'm not going for copious, I'm just going for some tomatoes, blueberries, maybe some grapes, definitely some blackberries, figs, persimmons and lemons. Of course, most of that is already growing pretty grand - I've really just got to make the tomatoes happen and tend to the new grape vine.

Which brings me to The Backyard Homestead, Produce all the food you need on just quarter acre! by Carleen Madigan. I like the potential in the title; "all the food you need". I'm all about potential. Between the covers of this hefty book is a tremendous amount of organic growing wisdom. In it you will find information about raising small farm animals also; chickens, rabbits, goats and I think she also mentions cows. Mainly I bought it for the gardening wisdom it offers. Crop rotation, companion planting, getting the most out of a very little bit of land. It's chalk full of that stuff. I'm enjoying it. Though I do wish for colored photographs, the illustrations are charming and enjoyable too. The information in this book may once have been just knowledge that was passed from generation to generation. Even city dwellers used to grow food. Alas, we've really shoved that life aside for the convenience of running to the market and spending more time in front of one screen or another. I for one am going to get off this screen and do something more productive. You should too! See you outside.

read: Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk

Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk by Ben Fountain bear-hugged me nightly as I read. This is a fictional novel about the reality many returning veterans experience. Billy Lynn is a 19 year old hero just back from Iraq where he witnessed his best friend's violent death. And where he killed people. And it was all caught on film and broadcast by CNN.

The entire novel takes place over about four hours at a Dallas Cowboys football game on Thanksgiving. We live inside Billy's head for the duration of the novel, where he struggles to keep some of his more horrible memories at bay, and struggles with people's reaction to himself and his brothers in arms also attending the game. His inner struggle, so eloquently penned, pulled at my own mind and misgivings about my country's involvement in war over the past decade plus. Our involvement in this war is as long as the life of my oldest child who has grown up to only understand our country in the context of war and struggle.

Filled with lyrical, biting language. It turns the lens on the American people through the eyes of Billy Lynn. We look ridiculous, misguided, ignorant, pitifully misinformed or willfully uninformed. I loved this book. I think everyone should read it. I'd go as far to say that I think it's an important book for our times.

heal: The Lyme Diet, a book

Did you know that 70% of the cells that make up your immune system are in your gut? Now you do. Dr. Nicola McFadzean's book The Lyme Diet, Nutritional Strategies for Healing from Lyme Disease is a great guide for eating to support 70% of your immune system, and helping to heal from Lyme Disease, likely many other auto-immune disorders such as, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, MS, ALS, chronic headaches, including migraines, as well as anyone who just wants to improve their health through nutrition.

Dr. Nicola McFadzean is a Naturopathic doctor.  Her book is written clearly and is easy to understand. It isn't too much or too little information to get started on caring for yourself better. In the seemingly brief 216 pages she lays out very clearly what you need to know about nutrition as is related to health and healing from Lyme. In fact, even if you don't have Lyme or know anyone with it I think you could benefit from reading it. Methinks this book should just be called: The Healing Diet, or The Healthy Way To Eat Diet. We can all feel better when we eat well.

read: The Orphan Master's Son

I hardly know where to begin in describing this book. I can begin by telling you what Chris said when he finished the book: "I think that was the best book I've read in my life". This book is so beautifully written. I could hardly put it down. It kept me up nights.

The Orphan Master's Son, by Adam Johnson takes place in North Korea, roughly present-day. We follow the life of Jun Do, the son of an orphan master. The reader is completely enveloped in the harshness, random violence, fear and helpless nature of the life of the average North Korean citizen. The utter lack of control Jun Do has over the direction of his life is unnerving. I went from disliking his character - he was simply not a likable guy - to finding in him humanity. But it was a slow discovery, both for the character and for the reader.

This book had me at its beck and call night and day until I finished it. It was painful at times what happened to the characters. Beyond any individual character's fate, though, the fate of an entire people are what you are left considering when you finally put the book down. I hope you will pick up a copy and settle in for a read.

read: The Gifts of Imperfection and revisiting FLOW

The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown was such a perfectly timed gift by my friend Linda (Thank you, Linda). She handed it to me at my door on her way to work one morning, the day after I got back from my trip back east this winter break. Linda had bought two copies, one for herself and one for her daughter. Her daughter didn't want it, but Linda new it was worth sharing and that's how it came to me. I know it's worth sharing too, and hope you pick yourself up a copy very soon.

To be honest, my first couple hours spent with this book made me feel pretty vulnerable. I put it down and didn't pick it up again for a week. I'm so glad I persevered, because I've had at least one incident that called for the skills I read about in The Gifts of Imperfection. And by skills, I really just mean I made a decision to step into the difficult moment with compassion for myself and others. This is not an easy task in our culture.

I've watched Brené Brown's Ted talks on vulnerability and shame and I really enjoyed them. Each talk is just about twenty minutes and worth your time, I promise. The subject matter may sound less than appealing, but trust me, it's worth a little discomfort. She unpacks the tools you will need for living a wholehearted life. She does so with humor and beautifully defined everyday emotions and experiences that we, as a culture do our best to ignore. Tools you need to live a wholehearted life? Courage, Compassion and Connection. It's a short 126 pages and they are filled with nutritious food for thought.

Brown's The Gifts of Imperfection reminds me a bit of the book Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. The Gifts of Imperfection, and how she got to her understanding of these gifts was through a spiritual awakening, or breakdown - however you want to spin it, it was a mind blowing event that changed her understanding of her research and herself. Csikszentmihalyi's Flow goes at it by examining a person's state of consciousness. We take a look at his subjects and theories from a slightly more distant perspective. I wouldn't say it's instructional, but by peeking into the lives of people who experience flow in their days, we learn how changing one's perspective on failure, for instance can change your understanding of who you are. And, incidentally, the less attached you are to your ego the more able to connect with flow you shall be. Not that I remember him mentioning ego in his book, it was more about how his subjects had a certain lack of self consciousness about them. And how they were able to look at failure as part of learning rather than labeling themselves as failures (another thing that Brown and Csikszentmihalyi have in common). Flow is one of those books that altered my consciousness and the way I approach my days. I will be ever grateful for that. It is a book worth reading again and again, methinks. If you haven't read these books, you should. Let me know what you think!

Don't have time to read the book, but want to know more? Spend a little time with TED:
Brené Brown's Ted Talks
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's Ted Talk

read: Unbroken

Laura Hillenbrand's book Unbroken had me up nights until I was able to finish it. It's a story about Louis Zamperini, a 1936 Olympic runner, bombardier, prisoner and wholehearted individual who overcame the darkest horrors of war. The story of Zamperini begins in his troubled youth and follows him through the start of WWII and his duties as a  bombardier in the war, but the bulk of this book is about his internment in Japanese POW camps, and the spirit of the man who survived. I was indeed spellbound by the story, I hope you take the time to dive into this Unbroken all the way through to the end. You'll need some emotional fortitude to get through the tough parts, but it does turn out positively.

In the author's words: "That first conversation with Louie was a pivot point in my life. Fascinated by his experiences, and the mystery of how a man could overcome so much, I began a seven-year journey through his story. I found it in diaries, letters and unpublished memoirs; in the memories of his family and friends, fellow Olympians, former American airmen and Japanese veterans; in forgotten papers in archives as far-flung as Oslo and Canberra. Along the way, there were staggering surprises, and Louie’s unlikely, inspiring story came alive for me. It is a tale of daring, defiance, persistence, ingenuity, and the ferocious will of a man who refused to be broken."

read: Bootstrapper

Bootstrapper: From Broke to Badass on a Northern Michigan Farm by Mardi Jo Link. Oh my, did I ever enjoy this book. In fact I don't think I put it down for a whole day unless I had to tend to the offspring. This is a memoir written by an absolutely stalwart and hysterically funny woman. Mardi Jo Link is not just funny and tough, though. Her writing is lyrical and I felt like I was along for the ride through much of the retelling of her experiences. Throughout the book she is searching for her spiritual self while she digs out of financial trouble and heroically holds her family together. At the end of the book I was so disappointed it was over, I wanted to spend more time in the trenches with Mardi Jo.

read: Masterminds and Wingmen

Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World by Rosalind Wiseman has been an interesting read. There is a companion book for boys called: The Guide: Managing Douchebags, Recruiting Wingmen and Attracting Who You Want. Coleman spent a few hours with The Guide. He just began middle school and I feel like now is a great time for me to read Masterminds and Wingmen. Coleman hasn't experienced much of what Rosalind and her recruits (all boys between 11 and 20 years old) describe about growing up in Boy World. I confess, I found their description of Boy World confounding. In particular how internal a boy's world is. It's information that will certainly help me better understand my two offspring. And The Guide can be useful for their future selves. How to communicate without going into a full blown conversation for instance. Fascinating.

read: Boys Adrift

Boys Adrift by Leonard Sax is surely one of my current favorite reads. It's thoughtful, well researched and hard to put down. This is a good book for anyone concerned with current social trends or anyone concerned with our future as a society and indeed our children's future realities. This book raises many concerns for the well-being of our children and future society, but also offers solutions.

The book is broken down into the author's five current concerns for boys: 1. Changes at School 2.Video Games 3. Medications for ADHD 4. Endocrine Disruptors (the result is between concern #4 and #5) 5. Revenge of the Forsaken Gods (or lack of positive male role models in popular culture and our society in general). I think this book deconstructs our current social anemia and articulates causes for our boys (and boys beyond US borders) lack of motivation from a medical, environmental and societal view point. Sax is a physician and psychologist he practiced family medicine for 19 years and has written other books: Girls on the Edge and Why Gender Matters. I hope you will have an opportunity to read this book. It's worth every minute you invest in it. Promise.

Learning About Lyme

I was imagining how I might have lived my life had I known about tick born diseases and how difficult they are to diagnose. Would I not have gone outdoors as a child? What would I be like if I had not explored the big hay field and creek behind my childhood home? The woods at the end of the street - what if I hadn't played in those? And, as I got older, would I not have taken my dog hiking in the mountains, woods and fields? Could I have escaped the disease if I had played life differently? Clearly I can't go back and do it all over, so this was a futile mental exercise. Recently I have been imagining my life after this body recovers from these little critters and the havoc they have wrought on it and my mind. It's got me a little giddy.

My history with Lyme Disease goes something like this: I got sick at some point, not sure exactly when. I can trace a rash and illness back to when I was pregnant with my oldest child, Coleman. But I can also say there were changes in my health a few years before that. Once Coleman was born my illness became dramatically worse. Symptoms were all over the place. A friend suggested I get tested for Lyme Disease. When I asked my doctor she said: "You don't have Lyme Disease. You're supposed to feel this awful, you just had a baby." My baby was about to turn one. I insisted. The test came back positive. I was treated. I got a little better but not entirely. And then I lived with it. For 12 years.

Two months ago I watched this movie: Under Our Skin, which you can watch streaming on HULU or Amazon. Hope for being myself again was renewed. But not before a tiny bit of despair set in. I spent a lot of time researching Lyme Disease and its co infections right after watching the movie. I became overwhelmed. Then I made an appointment. I found a doctor through searching "Lyme literate doctors" in my area. Lots of blood tests happened. Results for my blood tests came back positive for Lyme and Bartonella.

This is still a highly controversial disease. It's under reported. Misdiagnosed. Misunderstood. So often we need to learn to listen to ourselves and trust ourselves in the face of experts telling us it just can't be true. It must be in your head. If you're interested in reading more about diagnosing and healing Lyme and Coinfections here are books and a website for you:

Healing Lyme Disease Coinfections: Complementary and Holistic Treatments for Bartonella and Mycoplasma  by Stephen Harrod Buhner

Healing Lyme: Natural Healing and Prevention of Lyme Borreliosis and Its Coinfections Paperback by Stephen Harrod Buhner

 

 Why Can't I Get Better?: Solving the Mystery of Lyme and Chronic Disease by Richard Horowitz

http://www.ilads.org/

read: together

The summer is waning and we've run out of places to go, people to see and motivation to do much more than laze about the house. We spent a few hours yesterday and today reading this book, Leepike Ridge by N. D. Wilson. We like his stuff. This was a quick read-aloud (relatively speaking) and we easily connected with the main characters.

The story is an adventure-action combo. Young Tom lives with his mother in a house built atop a giant rock, it's also chained to this rock. The pair are both still mourning to death of Tom's father Ted. One morning Tom, after arguing with his mother floats down the river by their house and gets violently sucked under the the rocks by the rapid river. The story of his father's death is slowly revealed through his adventures beneath the earth in secret chambers built by pre-Colombian settlers. He finds a body, a live man, a dog and eventually his way back home. Lots of twists and strong characters. I recommend this book to 8 years and up. I know I really enjoyed it!

read: summer books

The boys and I just finished reading the fifth book in the Ranger's Apprentice series. It's called The Sorcerer of the North, by John Flanagan. This has been a really fun series to read together. It reminds me just a little of The Mysterious Benedict Society, by Trenton Lee Stewart in that the main characters are all orphans, all uniquely gifted and all learn to learn to embrace and hone their gifts.

We have been reading these books one after the other since May. If you are looking for adventure and thoughtfully, well developed characters this series may be for you or your kids. It's perfect for boys, but there are also strong female characters that would be appealing to young girls as well. There are no damsels in distress here. There is good against evil, quiet contemplation, personal challenges and intrigue.

Coleman just finished reading the Escape from Furnace series by

Alexander Gordon Smith. This is the kind of book that seems pervasive right now in young adult literature. Dystopian society with the young adults and children both victims and the heroes. Coleman spent many a late night reading these books. He was genuinely excited about them. I haven't read these books myself, but when Coleman finished the last book he told me he was almost moved to tears by the final pages of the final book, I figured it must have been at least well written. We just pre-ordered Alexander Gordon Smith's newest book The Fury, a post apocalyptic zombie thriller!

As for me, I'm reading Ordinarily Sacred by Lynda Sexson. I've only just begun, but I'm enjoying her take on sacred objects. I learned about the book from the lecture I went to a couple weeks ago, given by Ken Bova. He mentioned it and it's also on his website. I bought it for a penny on amazon.com. I am intrigued by the notion that we begin creating our sacred images early and without influence from religion. With just our surroundings and nature and what we perceive as precious. That notion is what I think informs Ken Bova's work. It's also something I observe in my own boys and even myself. I can look at the shelves in my own studio and see containers of objects I've been collecting for years that are precious to me and all with the purpose of one day finding a place for them in some piece of art or jewelry or sacred spot in my home. 

How to be Perfect by Ron Padgett is a book of poems. I haven't spent time with poetry since college. That's a long while. Intrigued by the title which is also the title of a poem in this collection, I was not disappointed. I guess I'm in the mood for being outside my own small world and my mind needs a rest from my own thoughts. These poems are very accessible and enjoyable. I hope you will have a chance to read some of them.

Here's a small excerpt from

"How to Be Perfect" by Ron Padgett - (I've highlighted the things that made me pause.)

Get some sleep. 

Don't give advice.

Take care of your teeth and gums.

Don't be afraid of anything beyond your control. Don't be afraid, for instance, that the building will collapse as you sleep, or that someone you love will suddenly drop dead.

Eat an orange every morning.

Be friendly. It will help make you happy.

Hope for everything. Expect nothing.

Take care of things close to home first. Straighten up your room before you save the world. Then save the world.

Know that the desire to be perfect is probably the veiled expression of another desire- to be loved, perhaps, or not to die.

Make eye contact with a tree.

Be skeptical about all opinions, but try to see some value in each of them.

Dress in a way that pleases both you and those around you.

Do not speak quickly.

Learn something every day. (Dzien dobre!)

Be nice to people before they have a chance to behave badly.

Don't stay angry about anything for more than a week, but don't forget what made you angry. Hold your anger out at arm's length and look at it, as if it were a glass ball. Then add it to your glass ball collection.

Be loyal.

Wear comfortable shoes. 

Design your activities so that they show a pleasing balance and variety.

Be kind to old people, even when they are obnoxious. When you become old, be kind to young people. Do not throw your cane at them when they call you grandpa. They are your grandchildren!

Live with an animal.

Do not spend too much time with large groups of people.

If you need help, ask for it.

Cultivate good posture until it becomes natural. 

If someone murders your child, get a shotgun and blow his head off.

Plan your day so you never have to rush.

Show your appreciation to people who do things for you, even if you have paid them, even if they do favors you don't want.

Do not waste money you could be giving to those who need it.

Expect society to be defective. Then weep when you find that it is far more defective than you imagined.  

When you borrow something, return it in an even better condition.

As much as possible, use wooden objects instead of plastic or metal ones.

Look at that bird over there.

After dinner, wash the dishes.

Calm down.

Visit foreign countries, except those whose inhabitants have expressed a desire to kill you.

Don't expect you children to love you, so they can, if they want to.

Meditate on the spiritual. Then go a little further, if you feel like it. What is out (in) there?

Sing, every once in a while.

Be on time, but if you are late do not give a detailed and lengthy excuse.

Don't be too self-critical or too self-congratulatory.

Don't think that progress exists. It doesn't.

Walk upstairs.

... There are two more pages of this poem, you should read it. It's lovely.

Read

Winter is such a great time to immerse yourself in a big pile of books, no? I only wish for a fireplace and a big hand-knit afghan to cuddle under, and maybe a sheepskin (fake of course) rug to lie upon while reading with a hot cup of chai or tea or cocoa. A little classical music in the background... Mostly I just read in the cracks between things that need doing - and at bedtime if I'm awake enough. 

I thought I would share what we're all reading right now:

My stack:

Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihaly: I've already mentioned this a couple of times in my recent posts (I think). It is worth mentioning again. There have been a couple of books in my life that have altered my perspective on my world. This is one of them. It is taking me a long time to get through, I'm taking notes. I'm also reading three other books simultaniously. Ah, ADD.

All Children Flourishing - Igniting the Greatness of Our Children by Howard Glasser with Melissa Block: This is a parenting book. It encourages parents, teachers and other individuals who work with children and adolescents to connect more deeply with their kids and especially when things are going right to be specific about what they are doing that is so helpful or delightful or compassionate. It's common sense, but while reading it I realize how little information I give the boys about what's going right and how much information I give them when things are going wrong. Food for thought. I'm not far into it yet, but I think it's also a perspective changer when it comes to interacting with people in general.

Being Adolescent: Conflict And Growth In The Teenage Years by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Reed Larson: This is an older book, written in the 80's. I'm glad I started with Flow, because this is less eloquent. Perhaps because much of it is the journaling of teens. How this is going to change my world? I think I've got to figure out how to get a little FLOW into the lives of my children in way of independent pursuits worthy of their own perspectives. Hm, that's a big job.

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, by Robert M. Pirsig: This one is just for the fun of it. I am going to guess most of you have heard of this book. I've never read it and downloaded the kindle version on a whim. I'm only on chapter 4, but I'm enjoying it so far.
"One of the most important and influential books of the past half-century, Robert M. Pirsig's Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance is a powerful, moving, and penetrating examination of how we live and a meditation on how to live better. The narrative of a father on a summer motorcycle trip across America's Northwest with his young son, it becomes a profound personal and philosophical odyssey into life's fundamental questions. A true modern classic, it remains at once touching and transcendent, resonant with the myriad confusions of existence and the small, essential triumphs that propel us forward."

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Coleman's Stack:

The Alex Rider Series by Anthony Horowitz: Coleman got book one from Nana for Christmas. Read it in one night. We had to order three more from the Capitola Book Café. He's totally loving this series. Though they may be a little easy for him, he's enjoying them late into the night each night. They are exciting and the main character is an eleven year old MI-6 agent. :)

The Diviners by Libba Bray: Another Christmas book, I thought he'd read it for his next class assignment, but he got half way through it over Christmas break. It's a bit creepy and scary but also a mystery and it's complicated enough that it keeps him thinking. This book is not for sensitive readers. The main character is Evie, a young girl sent to live with her uncle in New York city in the 1920's.




________________________________________________________________________________

Max's Stack:

Goblin Secrets by William Alexander: A Christmas book from me, Max and I have been reading this together each night. It's pretty exciting and creepy and well, I find it a little sad. The main character is Rownie (the diminutive Rowan) whose parents have both died, his older brother has gone missing and he lives with a witch who is unkind to all her "grandchildren". The society he lives in has outlawed acting with the exception of Goblins, they are permitted to act and wear masks. There is magic, intrigue and a great deal of loneliness and finding your way in the confusing world of grown-ups and evil all by yourself. I'm hoping for a happy ending...

Ender's Game by Orsen Scott Card: This was on the Kindle when we were away on vacation and Max and I started to read it. This is philosophically related to The Hunger Games. In that children are used by the government in their own game of keeping civilization in fear in order to rule them. I guess this has been so since governments have existed. There is a lot of violence in this book by children to children. And manipulation of children by adults. And manipulation of all people by those in power - and those in power are made out to be rather vapid. I'm not a fan of this book, to be honest. Max is enjoying it though. Coleman did not finish it, he became board, though I'm not certain why.
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Chris's Stack:

Chris is reading The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster to the boys. From Amazon: "It seems to me that almost everything is a waste of time," Milo laments. "[T]here's nothing for me to do, nowhere I'd care to go, and hardly anything worth seeing." This bored, bored young protagonist who can't see the point to anything is knocked out of his glum humdrum by the sudden and curious appearance of a tollbooth in his bedroom. Since Milo has absolutely nothing better to do, he dusts off his toy car, pays the toll, and drives through. What ensues is a journey of mythic proportions, during which Milo encounters countless odd characters who are anything but dull."

Very entertaining and fun!

A Fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry: A Christmas book, too! I got this for Chris because I had just watched Water streaming on Netflix (very sad movie, but I'd recommend it, along with a box of tissues) and was thinking about India. Also it was on the NYTimes best seller list, at number 2. I haven't read it but have talked briefly with Chris about it. It speaks of the caste system in India, which is something I only know of vaguely, and it's harsh. He's enjoying it, but it's an emotionally challenging book, I think.

From Amazon: "With a compassionate realism and narrative sweep that recall the work of Charles Dickens, this magnificent novel captures all the cruelty and corruption, dignity and heroism, of India. The time is 1975. The place is an unnamed city by the sea. The government has just declared a State of Emergency, in whose upheavals four strangers--a spirited widow, a young student uprooted from his idyllic hill station, and two tailors who have fled the caste violence of their native village--will be thrust together, forced to share one cramped apartment and an uncertain future.

As the characters move from distrust to friendship and from friendship to love, A Fine Balance creates an enduring panorama of the human spirit in an inhuman state."

Healing the Hyperactive Mind, by Dr Michael M Lyon: From the Author: "Healing the Hyperactive Brain" is the most comprehensive book ever written about the many factors contributing to attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). It is also an organized and authoritative presentation of the effective, drug-free approach, which is now being taught to healthcare professionals around the world" 

There is a lot of information in here about nutrition and how diet can effect you physically but also your brain chemistry. This is another life altering book, though I have to confess it's a slow road to recovery...

Read, Listen: Good Stuff

There is an overarching theme to the books I've been reading over the past couple years: Change. The belief that personal change is possible with work, understanding and will. I find it comforting that change is possible, and that one can choose to be different from what we've come to know as ourselves. Not just rearranging the furniture, but actually changing the physical structure of your brain, your feelings about yourself and others, your understanding of a given situation. And the way you lead your days and in turn your life.

I can think of several mind altering events in my life, which were small events, but big thought changers for me. One event was a meditation class at the Sunnyvale Zen Center. My motivation for taking it was to improve my memory. What I didn't realize when I began this class was that it could change many other aspects of my mind and behavior as well. The feeling I came out of that class with was a better filtered thought process. Like the difference between looking out a clean window or one covered with dog slobber. However, if you don't continue to practice, change the filter frequently enough, so to speak, well you will be looking through dog slobber once again.

I'm spending a bit more time reading for pleasure these days. Something about having both kids out of the house for school - time I guess. Also more space in my head, less worry, more problem solving. There have been a lot of books over the past several months, many on nutrition that are not here, others that were "mind changing events". I'm still very confused about nutrition, each book has a slightly or not so slightly different bent on the best nutrition for optimum health and brain function. But the books I have listed below, they have made a big difference in my life. I especially think Carol Dweck's book, "Mindset: The New Psychology of Success" is worth reading for anyone who is alive. As in, it doesn't matter what you do or who you are, this book can truly open your eyes to how you experience your life. And how you can change your experience. It's based on years of research and it's great. Read it. Daniel Seigel's book "The Whole Brain Child" is also very helpful as a parent. I wish it was out when my boys were babies. This book is helpful in understanding emotions and what's going on and how to think through tough emotional events and of course how to help your children with emotions and the thought process during emotional events.

I recommend these Books and CDs about Change:

The Whole Brain Child
Parenting from the Inside Out
The Brain the Changes Itself
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
Destructive Emotions: A Scientific Dialog with the Dalai Lama
Native American Healing Meditations
Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love and Wisdom
Mindful Moments: Ten Exercises for Well-Being

Let me know if you read any of these and what you think? And do you have other recommendations for me?